How To Make A Better Sales Page


Hi everybody!

I’ve been learning a lot about marketing and copywriting.

So I thought it would be interesting … and important… to show you a little ‘behind the scenes’ action on fixing up a sales page.

Recently, I created a marketing page to promote my brother’s cartoon marketing characters. 

…I thought it was a decent looking page.
but I wanted to get a second opinion. A new pair of eyes.

A friend of mine, Pat Flanagan is a copywriting expert. He actually critiques sales pages and helps one to improve them.

SO, I decided to have him critique my sales page to see if it could be better.

( I paid him for his services as I wanted an honest review. Didn’t want him to pull any punches).

He reviewed the page – and made a video as he went through it all. It was great! I watched the video and fixed up the sales page step by step as he walked me through it.


And I was surprised at some of the glaring mistakes I had made on the original sales page.

So here you go – I’m going to pull back the curtain a bit for you because I think you should make sure your own marketing efforts are working!
Maybe you’re not seeing something on your own pages that …if you changed or tweaked it a bit… could improve your sales!

Below, you’ll find links to the original page and the full 20 minute critique that Pat provided
… and below that – the final revised page.

( If you’d like to hit Pat up for a personal critique, Hop over to his page:
http://strategywhitepapers.com/sales-page-critiques/ )


Here’s the original Page:
(you can see it live here)

original version of Mascots2Go


Here’s Pat’s Video Critique:
(it’s about 20 minutes and it may give you some insights into fixing up your own page)


(you can view the video full screen by clicking the lower right ‘full screen’ button)


… and here’s the revised page.
(see it here live)

Revised version of Mascots2Go

 

What do you think? Do you agree? … disagree with the changes? Let me know below.

If you’d like to have Pat Flanagan critique your own sales page, visit him at:
http://strategywhitepapers.com/sales-page-critiques/

 

About the Author Marc Sylvester

Hi there! My name is Marc. Along with my wife Lisa, we run the best design software company on the net! Come on in and check out Laughingbird Software! You'll love it!

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